There are weeks that I am very excited about writing for this blog. There are even times that I get several weeks ahead with my posts. There are also weeks like this one, in which it is the night before my Wednesday self-imposed due date and I have nothing.
The last week has been an odd one for me. I have had extremely severe mood swings, taking me from feeling on top of the world to catatonic and suicidal. Due to these mood swings, and my desire to level out, I am now a patient in a partial hospitalization program (PHP), also known as a day hospital.
With the mood swings, the change in schedule, and the change in meds implemented by the day hospital psychiatrist, I have been a little discombobulated. I missed a DBSA (Depression Bipolar Support Alliance) meeting that I had otherwise been looking forward to. I also neglected this blog.
The day hospital is Monday through Friday from 8:30-3:30, and I am very fortunate to be able to say that I have a job that is working with me through this. My employer is not large enough for FMLA protections (50+ full time employees), but I have been assured that my job is safe. I am doing what I can from home each day after day hospital, and others are picking up the slack.
This is the first employer I have been honest with about an extended leave. I used to leave it at “medical issue”. With this employer, this is the second time that I have explicitly stated that my extended absence is due to “a mental health issue”. I have been met with nothing but support. This would not have been the case at my previous employer(s) and for this positive change, I am grateful.
The PHP will last anywhere from 2 to 4 weeks (technically up to 6 weeks, but I am told that is rare). I hope that the next weeks of this program I am able to create something of more substance for this blog, but I figure this week something is better than nothing.